Sweet Talkers

Whenever I travel to Moldova I carry my old laptop with me. It’s over eight years old now and is in deplorable condition. But it's sufficient for writing notes and documents and using the media player for listening to music and radio shows I’ve downloaded before I leave home. There are times at night, when I desperately need the benefits of a mental distraction, from the day’s events and listening to shows from the BBC, NPR, or ABC Australia provide a superb divertissement.

One of my favourites is Garrison Keillor’s 'Prairie Home Companion.' During one of the shows I heard him describe certain people as ‘Fifty dollar haircuts riding around on 88 cent heads.’ He was referring to our drive to constantly maintain an image of success.

Our culture is extremely good at image. It is also extremely good at looking at other people’s image and quickly forming opinions or judgements merely upon that image. And frighteningly, we’re extremely susceptible to forming distorted opinions that someone’s image can equate to goodness, intelligence and success.

Some of you may recall the name Glen Turner, or one of his many businesses: Koscot Interplanetary Enterprises or Dare to Be Great, etc. Mr Turner was the son of a sharecropper. He had no education and suffered from a noticeable harelip. Yet he took those personal assets and set out to make millions of dollars, in cash, by selling ‘dealerships’ to people for the right to sell further dealerships and so on. Today it’s called pyramiding. And those involved in these schemes today would be much more comfortable with the term ‘multi-level marketing.’

Mr Turner donned himself in unborn calfskin boots, ten-gallon hats, and constantly sported on the lapel of his finest polyester suit, a jewel encrusted American flag. In fact, one of his signature gestures was to give people the flag off his lapel. (Invariably, the jewels turned out to be coloured glass.) Mr Turner made compelling presentations to people from all walks of society.

His presentations began with how he had suffered all his life; he had nothing, had been rejected from society and lacked any self-confidence. He had strived to get ahead, but society kept pushing him back. He would tell, with great flourish, how he suffered at home, struggled to make ends meet and how relationships would fail. And he would tell people he was tired of it and he demanded change. He seemed to thrive on sharing his increasingly embellished life and the remarkable transition he had made. Part of his presentation included showing people large sums of cash; sometimes even throwing it into the audience. And with the élan of a Pentecostal minister he would beseech people to stand up and make a commitment ‘now!’

The audiences would be worked into a frenzy. There was a steady stream of people offering increasingly more expressive testimonials as to how their lives had changed and they had more money than they could ever dream – all because of Mr. Turner.

The seminar attendees would quickly fall prey to the electrified presentations. Mr Turner and his cohorts would proudly display their new cars and jewellery and convince the delegates that they could have all these things in no time - provided they jumped on the bandwagon with them. And they would convince them that by attending the seminars and ‘investing’ in a range of ‘distributorship titles,’ they could quickly become as successful as Mr Turner and in charge of their own destiny.

Thousands responded to the call. They mortgaged their homes, took out multiple loans on credit cards, with the encouragement from some of the team leaders to hide from the banks the true nature of why they were borrowing the money. The strategy was to appear wealthy in order to convince others of your success. That way you would successfully be able to sell others into your ‘dealership.’

Today, it’s a long ago memory. Mr. Turner is out of prison, but the concept of finite multi-level marketing schemes still thrive and countless thousands continue to fall prey to slick tongued teams who target the vulnerable, over-hopeful, and hopelessly gullible. Sometimes it’s even masked behind the impenetrable righteousness of a religious leader or a church.

Sometimes, all it takes is a fifty-dollar haircut for people to be drawn in to circumstances that will only lead to suffering and sadness. There are countless people out there determined to take what they can from you, no matter who they use and how badly they hurt you. All you have to do is look at the emails you receive each day saying you’ve won the lottery or have been invited to share in a bank transfer scheme. And sometimes, that Fifty-dollar haircut can look quite convincing!

Coming about things easily can be a formula for disaster and we are living proof of it, as we create a culture which simultaneously gets dumber and yet finds ways to ‘feel better’ about itself everyday.

Today, ask the Holy Spirit to show you when you aren't nearly as smart as you think you are. It's a bit of a stinging sensation at first, but then you start to realise that reality is so much more fun than the culturally approved, slick talker, or TV-induced hypnosis of being ‘wise in your own eyes.’


Lord in Heaven, help us to open our eyes so that we may see Your world more clearly. We know that our vanity is destructive to ourselves and others. Your Son taught us to be humble. Christ in Heaven, keep our hearts pure. We pray in Your name. Amen

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